Positive Life & Relationship Blog

I am a member of "The Let's Talk About Series" community. I'll be sharing notes from Tobi Afolabi (TASpeaks) on Comportment and Etiquette, a lesson delivered this year, in the month of February. Let's Talk About Series is a personal and career development discussion platform that discuss diverse topics to help boost people's productivity and build personal confidence. They are passionate about self discovery, and believe the strife for personal development helps in adding value to one's life; creating opportunities and setting priorities for the areas that make them most effective. You can check out the community on Facebook. ----- Tobi Afolabi: If I were to ask what we love most about Pastor E. A. Adeboye, I am likely to get comments such as he is humble, generous, polite, well dressed, cultured... If I ask same for Buhari, Dangote, Steve Harris, Jimi Tewe and many more, I am equally likely to get a similar feedback. Doesn't it amaze you that we...

Two days back, I went to the café regards NYSC registration issues. On getting there and making my intent known, the café guy said to me that the site was not yet opening as he had already checked that morning. I dropped my number, and asked him to give me a call or just flash when it does. I took his number too and went home. Over an hour later, no call. So I decided to call him, and when I asked him about the site, he said: "it's now accessible". Even as I headed out to the café, I kept wondering why he never called as we agreed. On getting there, the way he was acting — I doubted that the guy had seen me before. I once entered a taxi; turned out that I had never been to where I was headed to, that day. So I told the conductor where I was headed to and that I know it not. He said okay, no problem. So I relaxed, after all, I have informed conductor (sighs). The conductor forgot me and my destination. I was soon way past my destination, I trekked that day plus extra tran...

The Relationship Quotes today, is credited to Uchenna Ilo, a Writer and Author, whose mission is about bringing more love to lives. The Quotes: • You can love somebody and still not be compatible with the person for a long-term relationship. Know when to let go. • All she ever wanted was to be appreciated and loved back in return. She is tired of feeling invisible. • Be with someone worth growing with. • Her Greatest asset will never be anything physical. • Some people get so used to abuse in relationships that they start to believe that's the normal way they should be loved. • Tell someone how much you really love and appreciate their presence in your life. Don't expect them to know. Uchenna Ilo

The WORD Quotes today, is credited to a friend, Akuma Solomon. The Quotes: • The Force of impact of your destiny is largely determined by the impression of God's Word on your Heart! • Any faith that leaves you a fan of your comfort zone is a dubious "faith"! Faith is a "crazifying" force! It drives you overboard! • Confession builds the road over which faith hauls its "Mighty" cargo! Keep saying it! Don't stop talking it! • Winning the war of words is vital to winning the fight of faith. Never go dumb before your Giants! Talk them into dwarfism!!! • Over analysis of your mountain elicits faith paralysis. God's word isn't for deliberation. It is for Action!!! Akuma Solomon

The Quotes today is credited to a Facebook friend of mine, Dumbor Joseph Nafo. The Quotes: • For you to achieve anything in this life, you have to put up a fight. You have to fight for it. If you don't put up a fight, you can't achieve anything. • Don't be in the habit of discouraging people in every occasion. Encourage them. Your encouragement will spur them. • In life, there is always a CHOICE. It is either you say YES or NO, or you YIELD or RESIST. Don't ever say You don't have a choice. • Even if everyone is doing it, WRONG is never RIGHT. • In everything you do in this life, don't be a HATER! • I refuse to go back to the old me. I am becoming a better person using my past experience as lessons. Dumbor Joseph Nafo

Dear sister, I'm sorry to hear that your "heart" has been "broken" again, but I want to believe this incessant break is avoidable if you can apply the wisdom of a car dealer. You see, a lot of people walk into a car show room everyday. I categorise them into three - the faith walker, the bargainer and the buyers. The faith walker: They are taking a step of faith by pricing the car. You see them claiming it, speaking in tongues and when they have had their feel of the vehicle, they will say "we will be back". The bargainers: They are looking for the cheapest price available and after having their feel, they leave with "I thought it's cheaper here". The buyers: They just price the car, test drive it, pay and leave. Dear, it is difficult to tell any of these three by just appearance. The man carrying a KJV Bible with clerical shirt may be the buyer. The Chief with pot belly may be a bargainer, while the guy wearing an armless shirt wit...

You can either carry the pains of your past as excess baggage or convert it into a fuel of love to propel you into your greatness. The choice is yours, because the past is gone and cannot be undone. However, the meanings we ascribe to the tragedies of our past is hardwired into our subconscious and dictates most of our thought processes and decision-making in the present. The way we interpret those events can be rewired to give positive meanings to our pain. We must see those ugly experiences as part of a grand design that is intended to bring out the beauty in us. We must see our past as a strengthening process, a necessary refinement procedure that was aimed at leading us to our authentic self. Some of us have been through events that were not any fault of ours but we cannot continue to wallow in self-pity because life just keeps moving forward. Most times we are not aware that our past is haunting us but if we sit down to reflect in honest meditation, the truth will reveal itself. L...

For those of us that have a specific purpose to fulfill in God's plans and wonder atimes "why don't things seem to go well for me in this area no matter how much I sincerely try to make it work out?" My answer to you would be that the problem is not really with you or another person, the problem may not even be the devil. The problem might just be God personally frustrating your every effort to make things work out knowing that the time for it has not come... You'll weary yourself out trying to understand what went wrong or try things out this way or that way, you can go ahead and try. But you'll soon come to realize that it's not about how hard you try to make things work out, it's all about understanding where and what God wants you to be now. Discovering this might just be the solution to the many struggles you are having in that area... Rest your life in God in full trust, He makes everything beautiful in His own time. By: Abeyi Kingsley ...

God is not looking for who to use but who to bless... When we were invited to join the workforce, we joined easily because growing up, our parents never stopped telling us about God. We were eager to join the workers (of course we are still eager). We knew the gifts in us, we wanted to express ourselves and give our all to God. What are you doing with that wonderful voice? (Are you still singing wo?) Why not stand for God with your muscles and frame? (the bigger your chest as an usher the less headache you have directing people, imagine Broak Lesnar as an usher). Why not use your teaching skills for the Supreme Being? I know you sabi play instruments, are you still running after paying geeks alone? Everything you see today all started from the church. I remember the first time I taught the teenagers Sunday school... I was even a teenager then but maturity made me look and sound 24... Now, people dread working for God or committing themselves to Godly affairs... They think it ta...

August 21, the West stood still as the Sun blacked out for a few minutes to cast a most beautiful dusk on the earth. It was the Eclipse of the sun - the ones we read in geography textbooks. It's been 99 years since that last happened and this time around, 7 million Americans watched beneath protective sunglasses as the moon shone like a ring of silvery glass and the sun seemed cast into a dark, eternal abyss. To make a fetish of the event, some people worshipped, some prayed. To many, it was an event to remind them how real, if not how great, God is. Indeed, God must be beautiful! This would be until August 25, when Hurricane Harvey, a category 4 storm, swept through Texas destroying everything in its trail. Nearly 50 people died in its wake. At home in Markurdi Nigeria, a mudslide toppled 5000 houses and scores of lives were buried in cold blood. It's not long that Sierra Leone mourned their dead from natural disaster. The Phillippinos have had its share of storm surges and ...

Yesterday (on the day this was written), I watched Pastor Chris Oyakilome live as he preached. He used his iPad to read out scriptures. Later in the day, I saw a post on Instagram, and one guy like that insulted Pastor Chris for using iPad, instead of his Bible. I laughed at the man's ignorance. I remember an Uncle of mine was invited to a Church. He went there with his iPad, and someone asked him: "Sir, where is your Bible?” He showed him his 10.1 inches Pad. “But Sir,” he said, “This is not a Bible, this is iPad, you need to carry your Bible. You're not a good preacher, if you don't preach with your Bible," one of the pastors said. Now this is my point: Before the advent of printing press, the scriptures were originally written on a scroll! The ten commandments were written on a stone! Not on a Book called “Holy Book”. If the Book where the Bible was printed on becomes Holy Book, then my android phone is “Holy Android” because God’s word is inside it. Than...

If a man is indeed as he thinks, then what and who you have become today, came to be, as a result of your yesterday thoughts. To change your life, change your thoughts. To become anything, let it fill your thought. Where your treasure is, your heart will lie. Where you find yourself later, is a function of where your thoughts lead you. No wonder Apostle Paul encouraged: "Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue, and if there is anything praiseworthy - meditate on these things." Your thoughts make you. If God cannot change your mind, He cannot change your life. And until your life changes, your situation remains the same... By: Bimbola Tayo-Bamidele

Ten years ago, in a Bible quiz competition in my church's youth ministry, I won and was given a book. I didn't see the need for the book then though I read a bit of it and dumped it in our library. Fast forward ten years later, that book is blessing me now. God sent a book to me ten years ahead because he knows and has everything about me all figured out. Go back to your old books, diaries, jotters, primary and secondary school books, and you will have a reason never to give up. I stumbled over an Essay I wrote in JSS2 and I had to reassure myself I am super intelligent, I can't believe that came from a twelve year old. Seriously I cannot write with such dexterity now. In the course of life, we go through a lot of challenges and failures that tries to shatter us and make us feel we are not good enough but go back to the ancient landmarks, there are some things God told you in your teens that you may have forgotten. You must watch over prophecies in your life and pray th...

• Nigeria has won more football cups than England. • Ethiopia has the most airports in Africa. • Robert Mugabe has witnessed the death of four Vice Presidents who hoped to one day take over from him! • In North Korea, education and health care are free. • Barack Obama was the first sitting president to publish an academic paper. • Saudi Arabia banned the sale of camera phones nationwide in April 2004, but reversed the ban in December 2004. • Some men are fortunate with the type of woman they marry while some are not. The true behaviour of a woman is best seen after she becomes a married woman • A woman's heart beats faster than a man's. • A small child has greater wealth than the 2 billion poorest people in the world combined, since a small child has no debt. • The only part of your body that has no blood supply is the cornea in the eye. It gets its oxygen directly from air. By: Jude Onyekachukwu Igwe

• Stop chasing the wrong one. The right one won't run. • Humor is associated with intelligence and honesty, this is why people tend to be more attracted to those with a sense of humor. • Your brain works as twice as fast when you meet someone new. • A person from Niger is called a Nigerien. A person from Burkina Faso is called a Burkinabe. • Like horses, zebras sleep standing up. • Almost 50% of all pregnancies are unplanned. • Prostitutes in the Netherlands are required to pay taxes. • Bill Gates has donated a total of more than $27 billion in his lifetime, making him the most charitable person in the world. • Food tastes better when you are eating with people you like. • Women are more likely to be attracted to men whose feelings are unclear than men who have shown an interest in them. By: Jude Onyekachukwu Igwe

Abraham Lincoln once said, "I will continue to prepare and one day, my time will come." He ended up becoming one of America's greatest presidents. Why? Despite his failures and disappointments, he kept pursuing and preparing for his goal. It's better to be prepared for an opportunity and not have one than have an opportunity and not be prepared. Whatever it is you want, keep preparing because you expect to get it. And one day, your time will come! As a brand you need to grow and develop your brand consistently. In everything you do per day there should be something you are adding, developing or learning to grow and expand your brand. Opportunity can arise anytime in terms of getting high paying clients, customers or even an offer to collaborate with other people. It may be a referral. Your brand might experience Failure and the likes at some stage but keep pursuing your goal for your brand. Continue to add Value to your Audience and be consistent, it's very sw...

Attitudes are contagious. Is yours worth catching? (Bruce Van Horn) A leader takes people where they want to go. A great leader takes people where they don't necessarily want to go, but ought to be (Rosalynn Carter) Leaders must be close enough to relate to others, but far enough ahead to motivate them (John C. Maxwell) Leadership is unlocking people's potential to become better (Bill Bradley) In matters of style, swim with the current; in matters of principle, stand like a rock (Thomas Jefferson)

Stepping out for lunch today, clutching my notepad and devices, a man stopped me smiling. "Hello" "Hello" I greeted back as he extended his hands. "You look expensive", he said shaking my hands in acknowledgement. "Really? Oh..thank you." I managed to mutter wondering how a stranger can make such inference in a chance moment. "You sure do!" he responded as we went our separate ways. Imagine it was a business meeting, my first impression would have him sold. I looked for the next available mirror to see for myself. I did look fly rocking a bishop necked blue and white shirt made by Dapo Okeowo. My pictures don too plenty, I for show una. Lesson.. Always be mindful of your appearance it speaks volume. Mind you, I wasn't adorned gold or fancy jewels. Just simple top and pants. By: Peter Ochuko Kajovo

My hope was never to build a company. I was driven by a sense of purpose to connect people and bring us closer together (Mark Zuckerberg, Cofounder and CEO of Facebook) Everyday is a bank account, and time is our currency. No one is rich, no one is poor, we've got 24 hours each (Christopher Rice) Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work (Thomas Edison) Financial peace isn't the acquisition of stuff. It's learning to live on less than you make, so you can give money back and have money to invest. You can't win until you do this (Dave Ramsey) Rich people have small TVs and big libraries, and poor people have small libraries and big TVs (Zig Ziglar)

No condition in life is good or bad – it's all in your thinking! There was an old man who had gone to his farm for many years riding on his tamed and trained horse. One day, his horse ran away. On hearing the news, his neighbours came to commiserate with him. “What bad luck”, they said. “May be and may be not”, the farmer replied. The next morning, the horse returned, however, with three other horses (but untamed and thus wild). “How wonderful!”, the neighbours exclaimed. “May be and may be not”, replied the old farmer once again. The following day, his only son tried to ride one of the untamed horses. He was thrown off, and broke his leg. The neighbours again came and exclaimed, "how unfortunate!". “May be and may be not”, answered the old farmer again. The day after, military officials came to the village to draft young men into the army for the world war II. Seeing that the son’s leg was broken, they passed him by. “How lucky you are that they spared your son!”,...

It's time to let go of something that no longer fits in with your present reality and your dream future. It's time to let go of control and let yourself be free like true love. It's time to face your shadows and unlock those invisible chains of guilt that have been holding you back. It's time to forgive that person so that the heaviness of your heart will reduce. It's time to confess that truth you have been hiding so your conscience can be clean. It's time to love someone deeply no matter the risk of heartbreak. It's time to dream again and let go of your fears. It's time to start working instead of wishing your life away. It's time to be the person you truly are instead of faking it till you make it. It's time to build your inner circle of love and growth instead of being with people that add no value to your life. It's time to work on your health so that your body will last longer on earth. It's time to give up those bad habits so that...

Many people dream of achieving wealth as an Investor. However, most only dream. Few people fight through their fear, their laziness, and stop making excuses long enough to TAKE ACTION. Where are you today? Are you taking positive action toward achieving your financial goals? If you are simply waiting for your ship to come in, you are sunk. If you are passively waiting for luck to come your way, I'm guessing this time next year, you'll likely still be waiting and making the same excuses. I don't mean to come across as negative or to sound like a jerk. The reality is, I've been stuck by fear and had all the same excuses. My challenge to you is to figure out what is holding you back and get started. If you are afraid you don't know enough, or are worried about the risks – I understand. But, I want to encourage you to do something positive today. You have been in this business and you dont want to take action or you are on this group and still haven't made up you...

Behind every great idea, there will always be somebody who will be discouraging you by telling you that it won't work. They will tell you it won't be successful. They can even go to the extent of giving examples of people who have tried and failed. People will make attempt to make sure they discourage you from embarking on the journey to success but I want to tell you that nothing will be achieved by you if you are waiting for the time everybody will agree to support your dream. It is better to be alone achieving your dream than to be in midst of mediocre celebrating failures. Dream big, aim high, and never give doubt a chance. Ideas will always rule the world. By: Aghanwa Deborah

So this morning (on the day this was written), a friend and I got into a conversation and we were talking about work and how she wants her day to go. She started with "Oh! I wish my day would just go smooth, with little and stressless patients in the hospital, I don't want to make a mistake oh!" And with all the sorry wishes... Immediately! She got a hold on herself and said "No! My day will be stressless, I'll make no silly mistakes, my day will go smoothly..." You know, for a moment I tried to analyze and simulate the event and then I remembered something I read: ATTITUDE ARE MORE IMPORTANT THAN FACTS. How you think about a fact may defeat you before you ever do anything about it. We build up the feeling of security or insecurity by how we think, and by extension how we live. We just can't go by the day with sorry wishes. We need to first, expect the best from our day, confess the best, and most importantly work out the best. The result of our day i...

The year is running out. One of the things that Entrepreneur and business people face is FEAR. Everyone experienced that in one way or the other but the ability to overcome the fear is the best thing to do. Every new year, people have new year resolutions, but along the line they experience Fear, but sometimes we permit it. The greatest of all mistakes is to do nothing because of fear of failure or you think your effort will be insignificant. Just do that thing you already planned to do, it is better to try and fail than to not try at all. Every single idea, decision and action that can make the world a better place counts. I have seen some people with brilliant ideas but they are not ready to excute it. "The sun that's still shining outside is enough to dry your cloth" (Trying to interpret a Yoruba proverb). All what I planned to do this year, I have been able to do it but I still have like 50% to go. What are the things you planned to do but fear says no way? Please...

Often times, we are pressured to catch up with latest trends. We see the seeming progress of others and we say in our hearts "Oh my God, I am so backwards." We tend to forget that we all have our timing; that we have our individual season of celebration. It is true that we can create the future we desire. But even if we all apply relevant principles required for us to get to that desired future, the truth remains that our arrival time will still differ. When there was a call for all animals to come in their pairs into Noah's Ark, the dog, cat, tiger, lion, ostrich and every other animals got to the ark. The fast paced animals definitely must have arrived before the others. BUT THE ARK WASN'T CLOSED BY GOD... Until, the millipedes, centipedes, snails and other crawling animals got there. In our quest for Success and a better life, so many will say EUREKA in the morning - If you are a single female reading this post, and you are above 27 years, you probably can rememb...

“Every once in a while a revolutionary product comes along that changes everything” –Steve Jobs. True words. For me, I believe a person can come along and change everything. Don't wonder who that might be. That person is YOU. Find you, discover your happy place. Give vent to your uniqueness. Don't try to be like another person. Be you. What's your story? Be bold, own and share it. Businesses have been built on them. You don't know how to go about it? Ask. Don't be quiet and remain in one place year in year out. Move. You are shy, feel vulnerable? It's natural. Wear your scars. Clean your tears. You were born for a time like this, to add value to the world. Shine. Say with me, "I will shine for all to see". By: Peter Ochuko Kajovo

When things goes wrong, as they sometimes will, When the road you are trudging seems all uphill, When the funds are low and the debts are high, And you want to smile but you have to sigh, When care is pressing you down a bit, Rest if you must, but don't you quit! Life is queer with its twist and turns, As everyone sometimes learns, And many a failure turns about, When he might have won had he struck it out; So don't give up, though the pace seems slow, You might succeed with another blow! Success is failure turned inside out, The silver tint in the clouds of doubt, And you never can tell how close you are, It may be near when it seems afar ; So stick to the fight when you are hardest hit, It's when things go wrong that you mustn't quit! By: Samuel Oba

Keep Showing Up is a motivational speech from a motivational video by FearlessMotivation.com ----- If no one invests in you, INVEST IN YOURSELF. If no one believes in you, BELIEVE IN YOURSELF. Even if you don't see the results right away, KEEP SHOWING UP, until you see the results. Even if you don't see the results for a very, very long time... KEEP SHOWING UP. What if the results don't come. They're not going to come if you quit. KEEP SHOWING UP. I'm tired,  KEEP SHOWING UP. I don't feel like it,  KEEP SHOWING UP. I can't see any results,  KEEP SHOWING UP. I don't know where to start. JUST START, DO SOMETHING. Take that FIRST STEP. Every step you take adds up. And sooner or later, you'd look back and see that you're at the top of the staircase. It doesn't matter if you can't see the top from where you are. Just know that if you keep climbing, if you keep learning HOW, you can get to the next level. You'll soon be exactly wher...

The soul attracts that which it secretly harbors; that which it loves, and also that which it fears (James Allen) You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you (Dale Carnegie) Nobody can hurt me without my permission (Mahatma Gandhi) We can improve our relationships with others by leaps and bounds if we become encouragers instead of critics (Joyce Meyer) The royal road to a man’s heart is to talk to him about the things he treasures most (Dale Carnegie)

The Quotes today is credited to a friend of mine, Riches David Ndu. The Quotes: • Your life cannot depreciate when you appreciate. You cannot attract what you criticise. Thanksgiving should be more than an event. It should be a lifestyle. • When you are trying to achieve something and get stranded, always remember that God is there. He knows how to take care of His Own. He will not leave you stranded. • I define a failure not as a man without money and great accomplishments but a man that is walking and working outside of God's purpose. • When it comes to ideas and inspirations, there is division of labour. The Holy Spirit gives the inspiration and backs it up with transformation and conviction. Your part is to plan, prepare and package it with divine intuition. Riches David Ndu

Note that the advice you take and the people you emulate matters. You are being influenced, especially subconsciously, by the influences you take to heart. There are people out there operating at brilliantly high levels. If you’re serious about getting results, find those people and begin thinking like them. You’ll be stunned how fast your life can change (Benjamin Hardy) Failure is not the absence of success. Failure is the neglect of trying (Dr. Myles Munroe) Poverty and Mediocrity is a choice... not every failure is from the village (Rare Gentle) Do what you feel in your heart to be right - for you'll be criticized anyway (Eleanor Roosevelt) To do something you have NEVER done before, we must become someone we have never been before! (Marie Cochran)

One of the more fabulous stories I heard from a guy who was toasting me, was that he graduated from Annapolis Naval Academy. Turned out he couldn't swim and that's how his lie was uncovered. If the dots don't add up, they don't. I find that it's easier to be yourself in a relationship. Sometimes, a good way to take the measure of a man or woman is to see how they react when things go wrong. Do they give you leeway to make mistakes or do they berate you and fly off the handle? Do they adapt to your quirks or do they give up on you and move on? One of my oldest friends was always late for everything. Like really late. I used to be so irritated. I thought if he respected my feelings, he wouldn't keep doing what I hated. But, he's such a dear friend that my heart knew I was stuck with him forever. I think when you decide to make someone your friend, it changes how you deal with their quirks and weaknesses. In this instance, after a while, I stopped being irri...

A man once lived with his family. They did not have much but they didn't go begging either. He had three children - David, Kingsley and Rose. David, the eldest is a graduate, not married and had a job, while Kingsley and Rose were still in college at the time. Everyone in the household looked up to David for financial support since their parents are now retired. He (David) has a well paying job, he loves luxury and got himself whatever he desired. He lived a flamboyant and care free life. He loved women, for that fact he got himself an apartment so he could do as much as it pleases him with no restrictions whenever and however. He unscrupulously threw money around like it's a mere grain of sand and never bothered or made investments (Yes, he was that stupid). Kingsley and Rose weren't finding things funny at school. They've been stopped from taking lectures because they could not pay their tuition fee. Of course they asked, and David was skeptical and paying little wh...

After years of betrayals, abuses, bad luck, disappointments, and incompatibilities, you will finally meet someone who will love you according to your specification. Finally meeting someone who understands how to love you is like hitting a walk-off home run or like scoring the winning goal in a final game. Learn not to overstay your welcome in a toxic relationship or a relationship that is crippling your physical, financial and spiritual growth. Meanwhile, it is time to do your internal cleansing and stay away from people and places with negative vibes. Nothing positive can grow in a negative environment. By: Uchenna Ilo

About two months ago, a lady walked into the office and demanded for my time. We sat and exchanged pleasantries. I can’t forget it easily, her voice texture happened to be one of the finest I've had conversations with that time, well filtered. I complimented, but her response did not commensurate my altruistic praise. At least, I deserved “thank you Sir” Or, remove the sir “Bros, thank you”. I was worried why a grown lady like her did not understand etiquette. She asked, are you Christopher Peter? I said Yes. She continued.. “I was listening to you yesterday morning on radio (Love Fm) when you were talking on parenting, and something told me to come talk with you”. She started her chronicles; suddenly, her voice went dim and finally mute, her skin turned reddish, eyes swollen, body shaken, it wasn’t strange to me, so I encouraged her to take a deep breath and rest for a while. When she sum up courage and forced the words out, they splashed with tears and cry. The few words I coul...

Okay Friends.. This is the latest label on the blog. It came to my mind that I should create a section on this blog that's strictly for discussion, contributing positively to issues and sharing of ideas and opinions. Let us keep in mind that we should always be Positive as we individually and collectively work towards being the best version of ourselves. God Bless You StayPositive!