Mum OR Girlfriend (/Fiancée/Wife) Part 2
Alright! This the Part 2 of the post title. I'll share the issue and my opinion for the Lady.
A Lady complains of her Man tending to give much more attention to the Mum, than the attention she gets. Let's assume the Man loves his Lady and values her, but loves the Mum much more (Everyone loves his/her family, and everyone should. Sometimes, the love is so great and there are reasons behind that, exceptional reasons most probably).
How do both resolve this issue before it develops to a much more heated one?
The Lady:
Just like the Man, the she has to be sure that he loves her. If he actually doesn't, one knows the right thing to do is to back out and save oneself from some emotional, energy sapping stress.
Let's okay that her man loves her. Next thing is to figure out what went wrong; what she must have done and if the attitude is a reaction to something she must have done (most Ladies know this anyway). If this is the case, she tries to fix things up and restore the relationship.
In the first part, I wrote about what the Guy should do if he happens to find himself in the situation of showing much more attention for the mum.
For the Lady, after ruling out that she isn't the cause of the situation, she should try find out the reason(s) why her man does that. Ladies are emotional generally, and tend to exhibit jealousy. If the Lady can restrain herself from exhibiting jealousy, and be more logical, that will help her to logically handle this. She shouldn't put up obvious reactions to her man's attitude, and she should avoid verbal attacks using the man's attitude. There are many ways to handle this (logical ways I mean) depending on what the Lady thinks will solve thus issue better. But I'll recommend that she shows support for her man's attitude of caring so much for his mum. Then she tries to get close to the mum and try to initiate friendship with her. She can in a humble, caring, yet inspiring manner talk to her man, and let him know he loves his mum and would want him to bring them together as friends. From her carefully thought and worked out attitude, she can become friends with the mum and may have an influence on the mum that would make her let her son knows he has to care much more for his lady than he's doing. Also, she (the lady) can bring up the way she feels about the guy not caring much about her in a manner that would have a striking effect on her man and make him recognize he's not been doing fine with his lady. She can add that she'll help him to work it out, after she understands that her man has that weakness, and the reasons why he does.
In summary, relationship issues can be handled. It's best done if both partners will separate the emotional and logical parts of them, or better put, form a balance with both parts. In this case in question, a lady's first reaction could put a dead end to the fight and make her lose. Her man may get the unintended impression that his lady doesn't love the mum, and some men, when emotionally reacting, would take it extreme and react based on it. The logically acting man will ask his lady questions, find out why she reacted the way she did/said what she said.
The Lady should also ensure she isn't trying to take away her man's attention from his family. No lady should have such mindset that by getting married to a man, her own family issues becomes her man's. Rightly, the man will support her family if he's capable of doing that, but the lady should never see it as his responsibility. She'll be destroying her own family and creating a long term future unhappiness for herself.
I hope this helped? Share your opinions and contributions.
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